From the archives: And it wasn't even on the list

NOTE: The Orlando Weekly, the city's "alternative" newspaper (think Metroland for you Capital Region folks), did a cover story a few weeks ago called "Our Dumb State", with the subtitle "Halfway through, 2005 is already looking like one of the stupidest years on record." It went on to cite 13 examples, some of which you know about, and some you don't unless you live in Central Florida (you can read the article in its entirety here).

What follows was originally e-mailed to folks on Election Day 2004, November 2 - and it didn't even make the "Dumb" list.

Even though today is Election Day, the voting in Florida started several weeks ago. Early voting at a variety of places around the state. Didn't matter what precinct you were in, you could just walk into any early voting place and vote (how did they decide what races you were eligible to vote in?). But being from NY where you vote ON election day, this morning I went to the polling place for my precinct . . . it's located in a GATED community (!!!!) in a country club! I couldn't get in through the way Mapquest told me to go from my apartment, a reasonably short drive, instead I had to drive a couple of miles out of my way around to the other entrance. Why would you put a polling place in a gated community where access to it is limited? Voting is done here in Orange County by paper ballot. PAPER BALLOT!!! No chads, but you had to connect two sides of an arrow with a special pen to cast your vote. And there were two legal-size ballot sheets, both sides filled with candidates, county charter proposed amendments, and proposed state constitution amendments. And the arrow placement itself was a little confusing in and of itself. If you make a mistake, you must request a brand new ballot and start all over again.

And they wonder why they have so many problems at election time. Those mechanical machines back in NY may be big and bulky, but they were a lot easier to use and you didn't have many mistakes. Here the TV stations don't report on election results, they report on all the problems the different counties are having with their equipment, or that 69,000 ballots got lost in the mail (and some were out of state and may not get delivered in time to count), or signatures that didn't match, or . . . I've never seen such a disorganized, ridiculous way to do things.

To give you some idea of the kind of things proposed as amendments for the state constitution (I have yet to find out why these must be constitution amendments and not just plain old laws) - these were some of the issues: repeal of construction of bullet train between Tampa and Orlando (people voted for it in 2000, governor and legislature didn't want it and dragged their feet, and now it was lobbied to repeal; looks like it will indeed be repealed, how stupid); whether patients should know if their doctor has been convicted of malpractice three or more times; some vague proposal about lengthening the time people would have to research proposed amendments (nobody understands the wording and it will likely get voted down); whether both parents should give consent if their child terminates a pregnancy (down here that could be dangerous since sometimes the father is the father); whether to allow a couple of counties to vote - merely vote - on whether to have slot machines in existing horsetrack, jai alai, and dog racing facilities in their own counties.

Yes, indeed, elections down here are certainly . . . interesting.